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Alligator
They’re fast as a sneeze and low to the ground
It’s in murky ponds where alligators are found
It’s a myth that they can’t turn 90 degrees
If chased run quickly, or you’ll be Swiss cheese
Humans don’t have the horsepower
To outrun their 35 miles per hour
The only way to change their direction
Is to make them think they need protection
Look bigger than you are, raise your arms in the air
And hope the cosmos will answer your prayer
If this doesn’t work, I strongly advise
Turn around and kiss your ass goodbye
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